


Surreal Baseball

by peppergoji



Category: OFF (Game)
Genre: Bad Ideas, Comedy, Don’t copy to another site, Horror, IRL, No shipping nonsense, do you people honestly think the batter would know what a girlfriend is, trying to do a realistic version of what would happen if the batter actually came to the human world, trying to play this nonsense straight but not really
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-27
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2019-12-25 10:31:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18259475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peppergoji/pseuds/peppergoji
Summary: The year is 2019, and Janice is a loner college student with few offline friends, but this doesn't really bother her. One day one of her internet friends decided to try to drag her into a fandom that hasn't been active in years, and against Janice's better judgement she plays the game OFF. However, it soon turns horrifically surreal as a mysterious stranger barges into her life asking for guidance.





	1. Day One

“What the hell?” Muttered Janice, squinting at the black screen in disbelief. She’d just beaten the game or so she thought, guided The Batter over to the switch, but just when he was about to fight The Judge, the screen went dark. Pitch black except for a single message in a strange font that resembled scratchy handwriting. 

 

‘I will find you in three days.’

 

“This has to be one of the bad endings, ugh. Whatever.” Janice closed the game, then quickly went to restart it and continue from an earlier save point, but when she did so, all she found was the same screen as before. An empty black screen, with nothing else but the same message. Repeating this another time, only to get the same result, Janice scowled and rapidly typed a question into her search engine. ‘OFF glitch weird ending no continue.’ 

 

Janice’s scowl curled further, none of the results on the first page even mentioned the game OFF. She supposed it couldn’t be surprising, the game was an rpgmaker game that came out in 2006, but it used to be huge! Even to this day, there’s still a few dedicated fans lurking on tumblr, which is how Janice found out about it in the first place. That friend was who Janice was messaging now.

 

‘Hey, are you awake?’ Janice wrote.

 

‘Ye what’s up’ SK8’R’DIE instantly replied. Even after years of friendship, Janice still didn’t know his actual name, but that didn’t really bother her. Right now Janice was thankful for her friend’s horrible sleeping habits.

 

‘Skate, I beat OFF finally (lmao), or at least I tried to. I got to right before The Judge fight, but then the game stopped and just displayed this weird message, not even going to a credits scene. I think that’s kind of a shitty way to do a bad ending, not even letting you finish the game. To be honest though, I don’t think there really could be a good ending what with The Batter murdering literally everyone. And now I think about it, the ending’s is a little good, since it says some spooky shit like ‘I will find you in three days.’ Not that scary, but some good spook nonetheless.’ Jan1ce wrote.

 

‘That,,,is literally not what happens in any of the endings even the secret one with the monkey and shit’ Said SK8’R’DIE, who then rapidly kept messaging.

 

‘I’ve never heard of this fuckness in all my years in the fandom’

 

‘Wait what if mortis just hid it so well that nobody noticed and you just happened to trigger it oh FUCCCCCCCCKKK HE’S SO-’ Janice looked away as Skate’s writing devolved into a text wall of what if’s and general nerdiness that had no relation to what Janice said at all, past what he said in the first sentence.

  
  


“Okay, so it’s just a secret fourth ending. I’ll just watch the other ones on youtube or something.” Janice said to herself. She just so happened to glance at the clock at the bottom of her computer screen, which read three am. Janice then promptly went to bed, already regretting her life choices since she had a test tomorrow.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Janice’s dream was unusual to say the least. Normally, they resembled real life, however disconnected from reality that they were. But all around Janice were structures made out of paper cutouts, all the individual pieces being held together by yarn. All of the different types of paper had different colors, textures, and patterns, lending to an attention to detail that would impress her artistically, if it wasn’t for the subject matter.

 

She was in the depths of a cardboard cutout factory, or at least that’s what she could guess. The air was clogged with black smoke, making it difficult to breathe, but not difficult to see. Lining the walls were these massive pistons, all the size of school buses. Every three seconds they’d raise themselves up, then plummet down with a repulsive squelch. At the pace they kept it sounded as if Janice had been swallowed by some massive beast, and she was listening to it’s insides as it digested whatever helpless creatures it had consumed. The only light in this place was from some enormous furnace embedded into the wall at the end. This furnace casted long, shifting shadows across the room. Though half cloaked by darkness, Janice was able to make out what looked like intestines, lungs, and other internal organs being stretched out as they stuck to the piston raising itself into the air, only to burst when it came crashing back down. This process repeated until the flesh was beaten into a uniform red sludge, and then a wall made of hands pressed them out from underneath the pistons’ reach, making the sludge flow into a long, slanted trough that lead to the furnace.

 

As her eyes followed this crimson flow the spell keeping her feet bound was broken, Janice turned away from this twisted machinery and ran to find an exit. Her legs hit something solid, making her trip and fall face first onto the blood caked floor. She cried out in pain, clutching her now broken nose. The pain of feeling shards of her own bone cutting into the muscles of her face consumed her most of her attention, but she was able to make out the soft weeping of another, laying right next to her. Opening her eyes, she saw what looked like a pale child dressed in...something. There was so much blood on them it was hard to tell what they were wearing, but she saw that they had on a tie. After some groveling, Janice picked herself back up and approached them.   
  


“S-sorry! I didn’t see you, I hope you’re not hurt too bad. We need to get out of here!” That’s what Janice would have said, if the child hadn’t kicked her in the shins before throwing himself under the piston. Janice stood there and watched, paralyzed as he screamed for help even after his head had been crushed, with bits of his brain and pieces of his skull pooling around him. Janice couldn’t stand it, and she covered her eyes and turned away, resuming her efforts to escape. 

 

Pulling her hands away, as it was she was half blinded by the tears streaming down face, but still she continued. Running to the end opposite of the furnace, she came to a solid metal wall with next to no visible aberrations in its smooth surface. Walking sideways, she pressed her hands to the wall, feeling for the frame of a door as she sidled along. After taking five passes, she found her mark and wrapped her shaking hands around a stiff doorknob. The door didn’t give when she pulled, so she tried the other direction to moderate success. Something had to have been blocking it from the other side. Just as she took a step back to get her bearings, all around her more screaming tore through the air. Before every piston stood neat, single file rows of children stood there, waiting for their turn. It was at that moment that Janice realized that these humanoid lemmings may not have been children. While they were small, coming up only to Janice’s knee, all of these creatures had the exact same body proportions as an adult human, with small heads, hands, and gangly pale limbs. Along with this, they were all identical in every single aspect, save for the pattern of blood stains covering their bodies.

 

On one of them that was cleaner than the others, she could finally recognize what they were all wearing. It was a black business suit, save for the jacket, with white long sleeved shirts, black ties, and what she could only assume were once black shoes. With a morbid realization, Janice turned back to the door. 

 

Taking a step back, she then ran at the door, kicking with the full force of her body. The door then proceeded to give way as if there had been nothing behind it, and she was sent falling into a black abyss.

 

Bolting upright in a cold sweat, Janice took several deep breaths to calm herself down. After this, she slumped back into laying down and groaned, then turned her head to check the clock. 6:55, five minutes before her alarm would go off. “Who knew nightmares had good timing.” Janice grumbled, pulling herself out of bed to get ready for school.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Sitting in philosophy class Janice struggled to stay awake, or at the very least learn how to sleep with her eyes open. After chugging a pot of coffee to be awake from her math exam, into her second class she was crashing, and crashing hard. “Thank fuck I’m not in highschool anymore…” She said softly.

 

“That’s something I’m sure quite a number of us have thought before, but that isn’t relevant to today’s discussion, is it Miss Juniper?” Janice buried her face in the table she was sitting at. Some of Janice’s classmates snickered at her, but one disapproving look from Dr. Neverwinter silenced them.

 

Dr. Neverwinter was just as odd (and geeky) as his name would suggest. Dressed in full wizard gear except for the pointy hat, Neverwinter was the biggest kook that Janice had ever met in her whole 19 years of life. But then again, he was a philosophy professor so Janice figured that she should count herself lucky that he actually got around to doing what the curriculum said he would. In fact, he was so good he even had a third of a semester dedicated to his own personal topics on top of what the college wanted him to do that it often left his students in over their heads, as Janice discovered. Thankfully he held three assisted study halls a week, and that was enough for most students to get by.

 

“Sorry Dr. Neverwinter, I didn’t get much sleep last night.” Janice mumbled. 

 

“Worry not, I’ll make sure to wrap things up early for you today, and ask later if you need help with notes.” That was another odd thing about Dr. Neverwinter, no matter how soft you whispered, he could hear exactly what you said, even if you weren’t sure that you even said it at all. Some students would even joke that he was a psychic alongside being a mage.

 

“Miss Juniper? Did you hear me? I said, would you like one of my spare blankets, or a pillow? I keep them in the closet.”

 

“No, thank you Dr. Neverwinter.” Janice replied, forcing herself upright. The professor nodded respectfully at her, and resumed his lecture.

 

“As I was saying, due to the unknown nature of why the big bang happened, science has theorized that it came from an outside source...” Despite her best efforts, Janice drifted off.

 

The next thing she knew, everyone was gone aside from the professor, who sat at his desk at the front of a room reading a book. Janice stretched, knocking off the blanket that was wrapped around her shoulders. Hearing her stir, the thin man stood up, his messy, short dark hair drifting in the breeze as he walked. Approaching her table, Dr. Neverwinter handed her a notebook and smile. “Here you are Miss Juniper, I hope you have a better time sleeping tonight.” Janice returned the smile and took the notebook, also making the effort to pick up the blanket behind her.

 

“Thanks teach, see you next week.” Janice gathered her things and left, waving goodbye as he stood in the doorway and did the same. Lugging her backpack on her shoulder, Janice kept a watchful eye on her surroundings, since it was dark after all. And while she did like her professor, there was no denying that he was  _ weird,  _ so she couldn’t let her guard down. It had gotten dark outside, and as she walked on campus she saw only a handful of lit windows. It was quiet, save for the sound of crickets and her own footsteps. The trip to her bus stop was uneventful, and seeing that nobody else was there, she took a seat on the bench and pulled up her phone. The bright light of the screen hurt her eyes some, so she went into the settings and darkened it some.

 

Glancing around, she saw some cars driving along the street, but no sign of her bus, so she looked back to her phone and pulled up her messaging app.

 

‘Hey skate. Sorry I didn’t reply, I’ve been tired all day. How are you?’

 

‘Don’t worry mate I’ve been good. I talked to mortis today about the secret ending you found’

 

‘And he totally denies that it exists so im thinking that you’re pulling my leg not cool man’

 

Janice checked for her bus, then replied. ‘No, I’m not lying. I’ll take screenshots when I get home and show you.’

 

‘Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm’ Replied SK8

 

‘Maybe when i sent it i linked a fangame on-’ Janice heard the telltale hiss of a bus’ brakes, so she stood up, and got onto the bus. Slipping her bus pass into the machine, she took her usual spot near the front of the bus, and watched the road as they traveled. She knew the way home by heart, but she was not in the mood to end up in an unexpected place on a night like this.

 

Just when the bus arrived at the second to last stop before her’s, Janice just so happened to be looking up at a streetlight when a large black shape came to perch on the lamppost. It was black and inky, crouching on the lamppost like no bird Janice had ever seen. Just when she was starting to get a good look at it, it turned and looked at her with an ocean of blue eyes that reflected the light of the moon. Just as swiftly as it appeared, it flapped its wings and took off into the night sky. 

 

Janice blinked slowly, wondering if her lack of sleep had finally started to do her in, but the a feminine robotic voice on the intercom chimed ‘Next stop, Cherry Grove Road.’


	2. Day 2

Rushing home, Janice locked the door behind her, and then moved to lock every single window and door in the house. She’d read too many creepypastas in her life, and it was better to heed paranoia and look like a fool than to end up dead. 

 

With this done, Janice let out a sigh and headed into her room. Taking a seat in her rolling chair, she scooted up to her desktop and booted it on, and discord started itself up automatically as per usual.

‘Hey skate, I’m back. I can get you those screenshots now.’

 

‘Nice,’ Replied SK8, “i’ve always wondered what your photoshop skills looked like’

 

‘Probably not good, since I just had a run in with mothman and I’m a little shaken up’ Janice joked, realizing that she probably could tell this to nobody.

 

‘Lol you wish’

 

Letting out a sigh, Janice went and booted up her game, and like before it was a pitchblack scene, with an exception. The girl squinted, taking a second to read the text before taking a screenshot and sending it to her friend.

 

‘“2 days remain until I find you.” That’s some ominous shit man i like it’ SK8 replied, but Janice wasn’t too sure it was something to laugh about. 

 

‘I’m feeling kinda tired, I’ll go to bed early this time. Good night skate.’

 

‘Night Janice’

 

Janice lied, she didn’t go to bed at all, instead, she dug around her room and found her old 3ds and booted up a copy of pokemon diamond, spending all night leveling up her team before collapsing from exhaustion at 4 am. Thankfully, she had no school the next day, but that was about it for her luck.

 

No matter where she was in her room, or what she did, she felt like there was something watching her, and that carried over into her dreams.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

It wasn’t out and out nightmarish, not at the start. Instead of the furnace from hell, she was sitting in her philosophy class, listening to Dr. Neverwinter lecture, or at least try to. His mouth moved with speech and he smiled as he spoke, but nothing discernable came out, just a strained gurgling as he choked from whatever was lodged in his throat. 

 

There was nobody else in the class and it was a cloudy day outside, so foggy that Janice couldn’t see even a foot outside of the windows. Turning her attention back to her teacher, she noticed that his eyes were following her at her every action.

 

“Um, Dr. Neverwinter? Can I go to the bathroom?” Janice asked. This made the man pause. He closed his mouth, then smiled as a white feather fell out.

 

“No.” The man said, in a voice that was not his own. It was inhuman and raspy, like the sound of a crow mimicking human speech.

 

Suddenly Neverwinter erupted in coughing, and he bent over clutching his throat as blood and more feathers came pouring out of his lips. Janice got up and ran over to help him, but the doctor shoved her away. Looking up with fearful eyes, he mouthed to her ‘run away.’ And so she did.

 

Bolting to the door, Janice pushed it open and headed sprinted down the hall. As she ran, she heard the man screaming with pain amidst the sound of bones snapping like firecrackers. Without looking she could feel that something was chasing her, and sure enough something was. 

 

The sound of her feet slapping the ground was soon drowned out by the heavy slamming that shook the earth. The size of whatever was chasing Janice threatened to break the floor under her feet. Running harder than she ever had in her life, Janice sprinted for the elevator, hoping that it’d carry her to freedom. 

 

Her legs ached and her lungs burned, but Janice wasn’t going to stop for anything, and that dedication brought her to the end of the hallway. However, just as she was about to press the button on the wall, the elevator opened to reveal the figure that she had seen earlier.

 

Inky black with furled wings coiled around its body and an ocean of mismatched blue eyes covering every possible space on its face, it reached out with a three fingered hand adorned with gnarled, ingrown claws with the texture of rusted metal. Janice jumped back before it could pull her in. Tossing her head around, she looked for an avenue of escape. 

 

The hallway was a straight shot with no other way to go aside from the elevator and the stairs adjacent to them. Charging to her right, Janice ran for the stairs. She made it there before the shadowy monster could grab her and went down the steps.

 

It was now that Janice realized the mistake in her plan, she’d have to slow down her pace if she wanted to keep from taking a tumble, but now was too late to double back. All she could do was keep running, and hope that her decision was the right one. 

 

Janice made it down three flights of stairs, and with every flight she heard the footsteps following her grow fainter. When she made it to the ground floor, then, and only then did she turn around to see what was chasing her.

 

Looking up the flights she descended, there at the very top an accursed chimera of three strange, yet familiar creatures, loomed above her. The body of the creature was larger than an elephant and twice as wide. There was no way it could drag itself down the stairway, or even fit through the column of empty air between them. This lended a small sense of security to Janice, and she let herself inspect the creature further.

 

The torso of the creature was very distinctly humanoid, even if its’ proportions were completely out of scale. It’s skin was a ghostly pale, mottled with dark purple bruises all over the surface. Where it’s head should have been, there was a massive bloody stump. Atop that bloody stump, the torso from another, far smaller creature had been surgically attached. It was so much smaller than the main body that it barely even covered a third of the radius of the host’s neck, and the ring of raw exposed flesh bled constantly. 

 

Even still, that torso was still half again as large as that of an average human, and probably used to be quite muscular. At least it did before it had every bone in its body broken twice over, and it hung over on it’s side, limp and useless. From a bloody hole in the middle of the upper torso’s stomach, the neck of a long crane emerged, swaying too and fro. Janice couldn’t see it’s eyes from down there, but she had a theory.

 

“You’re blind.”

 

As soon as she spoke, the crane whipped it’s head around with a sickening crack, and stared directly at her with empty eye sockets. Janice covered her mouth, cursing herself mentally as she slowly walked away, careful not to make more noise than she had to. Darting her vision from the stairs to the elevator, Janice continued down the hallway, making her way to where she remembered the closest exit was. 

 

Approaching the front door, she saw that the fog was outside was just as thick as before, and hesitated. Assuming that the winged creature she saw earlier was still after her, was it really good idea for her to go outside into a wide open space? Janice clenched her fist, taking a moment to think, but she knew she had to think quickly. 

 

‘Based on how many eyes it has, it’s most likely a sight based predator. The fog would make it hard to see but-’ She remembered seeing something that looked vaguely like antennae when she saw it last. ‘Shit the water vapor would make it easier to follow my scent.’ She bit her lip and looked behind her. 

 

She saw nothing at the moment, but even now, she heard the sound of heavy breathing coming from the floors above her. Janice decided to take her chances and opened the door, heading outside.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Awakening to sunlight on her face, Janice sat up, then rolled back onto her side. “Not as bad as last time…” She muttered. Pulling herself out of bed, Janice headed down to the kitchen to satisfy her grumbling stomach. After a few moments, she was sitting at her kitchen table munching on a bowl of cereal.

 

“Wonder where my parents are, they were supposed to be back by now…” 

 

Janice picked up her phone and checked her messages, but with no response. Janice felt a pang of worry, so she sent both her parents a message saying ‘Hey, when will you be home.’ Having a bad feeling about this, she switched to her news app. 

 

Sure enough in the bahamas, where her parents were visiting, there had been a freak hurricane that was keeping all air traffic at a halt during peak tourist season. Janice felt her chest tighten. The only thing she could do now was keep her eyes open, so she turned her phone off of silent.

 

Still, she wanted to and distract herself from the anxiety gnawing in her guts, so she carried her bowl of cereal upstairs and turned on her computer.

 

She was going to turn on a cat video, but just before she was going to click the link, she remembered the specifically themed nightmares she’d been having, and decided against it. The last thing she needed was more fuel for her brain to make nightmares about The Judge, whatever they’d be like. Turning on discord, she messaged her friend.

 

‘Hey skate, are you awake?’ It was 1 pm in the afternoon, but Janice could never be sure.

 

‘Ye just woke up how are you’ SK8’R’DIE replied instantly.

 

‘Same, but not that good. I’ve been having a rough couple of days, can you send me something funny to watch? I can’t watch cat videos like I normally do.’

 

‘sure’ Said SK8, and he linked her to a number of snake videos. Janice chuckled a little.

 

‘You and snakes man.’ Janice typed. Nonetheless, she clicked the video with the little round snake playing in a miniature sandbox and watched it. 

 

Everything about the video was cute, from how small the snake was and how big it’s eyes were, to the fact that the tiny sandbox was shaped like a turtle. Janice audibly gasped when she saw the snake poke it’s little face out of the sand and stick it’s tongue out. She then proceeded to watch the video about five more times and felt a little better.

 

‘Thanks skate.’ She typed to her friend.

 

‘no problem Janice’ replied SK8

 

‘btw if you ever want to talk about anything i’m here’ 

Janice paused, considering Skate’s offer. She didn’t see any downside to being honest with him. Despite his devil may care attitude about most things, he was considerate when it counted. Janice remembered when she broke up with her first girlfriend and she was a wreck, and Skate read her long winded cry typing and offered the right words she needed.

 

‘Okay. I’ve been having some really fucked up dreams recently. I think my brain is fried from too much homework maybe, and my parents being caught in that storm in the bahamas really isn’t helping things.’

 

‘oh shit that’s awful i’ll pray for them do you have anyone to be around so you’re not just by yourself in the house?’

 

‘No, it’s just me.’

 

‘fuck that man let me know if you wanna do a call or something no pressure tho’

 

‘It’s okay. The weird thing is that all my dreams up until this have been OFF related, kinda. Night before last I dreamt I was in an elsen sugar factory or something, and last night I dreamt I was in school where all the guardians got turned into a nasty kind of frankenstein’s monster. Also mothman was there.’

 

‘oof. maybe you should uninstall the game if it’s giving you that kind of anxiety’

 

‘Maybe.’ Janice replied. ‘To be honest, I’m still to curious. I think I’ll boot it up now to see if it’s changed again.’

 

‘i think that’s a bad idea but i can’t stop you’ SK8 replied.

 

‘It’s just a game skate. No matter what my subconscious may think, it can’t hurt me.’

 

Janice booted up OFF, and like she expected, the message had changed. It now read, 

 

‘I will come for you in the night.’


	3. Day 3

Janice quickly closed the window and exhaled sharply. “This is stupid. I’m not going to let myself get freaked out by a fuckin’ game. I’m not some 11 year old pissing their pants over momo challenges.”

 

Janice couldn’t lie to herself, she was definitely scared over a game. Though it may not have been the game by itself, it was undeniable that she was having nightmares about it. And that fact pissed Janice off more than just about anything.

 

“Fuck this. Fuck this game. I’m gonna do something so fucking productive.”

 

Janice got up from her desktop and went downstairs to do the thing she always did when she was angry. Heading into the garage, she picked up her boxing gloves from a shelf and stretched her arms out. Jabbing her left fist into a fake torso, she threw several more quick punches before going for an uppercut that made the BOB almost fall over. Janice nodded in approval, but then leaned over to check if the water in the base of the punching bag was at a decent level. It was exactly where it should have been.

 

Going back to her position, Janice kept punching, trying out different moves to keep things interesting for herself. A haymaker, a couple side jabs here and there, all of this leant to working out her anger, and making the woman feel more in control. The physical fitness that came with it didn’t hurt either, and an hour later, she was hot, sweaty, and relaxed. Heading upstairs, she took a quick shower to get the salt off of her body.

 

While she was scrubbing her hair, Janice’s mind drifted to that strange message she read earlier. While it had been unnerving her, she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t interested. Janice had never heard of an old rpgmaker game having a real time clock function, and she knew it couldn’t be a timer, unless it could somehow run while the game was off. That could be just her own lack of technical knowhow though. 

 

“Why would somebody make a fangame that looks the same as the original, and only have their own content at the end? There’s no way that would get popular, people would just download it and not even realize what it is.” Janice mumbled to herself. 

 

Truth be told, anyone who would go into the time and effort to make a fangame for something that hadn’t been relevant in years probably didn’t care much about exposure, but that’s assuming that it was made recently. For all she knew, this could just be one of the many forgotten parts of the fandom.

 

Forgotten, that’s why she was interested in the game to begin with. The world she saw in that simple program was a glimpse into a place abandoned by hope. Even before she guided The Batter to destroy it, the place was a graveyard. 

 

With ghosts everywhere and populated by people who were always haunted by the fear of their inevitable demise. Janice was mislead into believing she was helping, but now she knew that all she had done was just making their deaths quicker.

 

She sighed, feeling a little glum again, but she was impressed. Very rarely did she see something in a game that made her feel worse than she usually did.

 

Closing her eyes, Janice focused on the sensation of water pouring streaming down her body, and even though the water was warm, she was suddenly cold.

 

She could see herself as a child once again, standing in the rain in the middle of a graveyard. In the background, she heard people speaking, but as she stared ahead at a wooden box on a pedestal, they just droned on like endless wail of a siren in the distance. She couldn’t understand a word they were saying. She couldn’t understand why he did it. She couldn’t understand anything. 

 

Janice let herself cry the tears she was unable to shed that day, the remorse from all those years ago as fresh as it had ever been. Weeping silently, she stood there in silence until she had no tears left to shed. Turning off the shower, she walked out and grabbed a towel off of the rack attached to the wall and dried herself off.

 

Janice stumbled over to the sink, brushed her teeth, and headed to her room. Feeling tired and drained, all she cared about now was getting to sleep. And pulling on her pajamas, she aimed to do just that, and climbed into bed.

 

Closing her eyes, it took her a few minutes, but she slowly drifted off into a black void of nothing…

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Light filtered in through the slats in her window blinds, landing right on Janice’s face. Groaning quietly, she rolled over and out of the light, not wanting the day to begin just yet. Tossing and turning for a few more minutes, she knew that escape was futile, so she sat up and opened her eyes.

 

When she did so, she noticed that in the corner of her room, in an armchair she never used, there sat a man. Janice blinked slowly while her mind processed this. As her eyes focused, the man in her vision became clearer, rather than vanishing like the trick of the light she thought he was.

 

She heard the floorboards creak as he started to stir, and Janice’s heart skipped a beat. Shoving her blankets to the side immediately, she got to her feet. 

 

Looking at him directly now, the girl’s eyes scanned him from the bottom up as she watched him for movement. There before her stood a tall, muscular man with black boots, with white trousers, a white tunic and a black, long sleeved undershirt. 

 

When she saw his face, her mouth gaped open, for a split second thinking it was  _ Him,  _ that maybe he really didn’t die, that maybe he-

 

Then the man opened his second set of eyes. All at once Janice realized that she was gazing at a stranger. An inhuman being with deathly pale skin, four blood red eyes glowing from beneath the shadow cast by his black ballcap, and his hands gripping a baseball bat.

 

“What the fuck are you doing in my house?!?” Janice spat, being strongly the fight over flight kind of person. Still, was terrified, but god damn it if she wasn’t going to fight for her life.

 

The man’s lip curled ever so slightly in annoyance, the first sign of emotion he’d shown thus far. “I told you I’d be coming in the night. And I arrived.”

 

The thought of this freak watching her while she slept made Janice’s blood boil, and she darted for the knife that she kept on her nightstand. Yanking it out of its sheath, she got into a crouched fighting stance, pointing the blade directly at him. 

 

The man didn’t look the slightest bit phased by this, but he didn’t put his weapon down either. They spent several minutes like this, silently studying each other. Even if his mouth didn’t move much, his eyes were very expressive, and Janice could see the gears in his head turning. 

 

Seeing this as an opportunity, she started to edge towards the door. The man mirrored her movements, clearly intending on keeping her from escaping.

 

Janice was gripping her dagger so hard her knuckles were going to turn white, and she lunged forwards, burying the blade in the man’s abdomen while she took off down the hall. She heard heavy footsteps following her, and she turned her head around in disbelief.

 

Even though he had been  _ stabbed _ in the gut, he looked no worse for wear, and had yanked the dagger out and was now running after her down the hall, and he was fast. Turning left, she headed to the front door, and while she did so, the man took the alternate route and cut her off due to the house’s circular design.

 

“What the fuck is he?” Janice hissed to herself.

 

“I am The Batter. I need your guidance.” The man replied flatly.

 

Janice sputtered some, his appearance suddenly made complete sense, and Janice wanted to kick herself for not realizing it sooner.

 

“I’m being attacked by a fucking kinnie?!?” Janice cried through clenched teeth. 

 

“I’m not attacking you.” The Batter’s lip curl was back, showing off one particular tooth that was crooked so that it looked like a fang. Janice ground her molars, being reminded of certain person yet again. 

 

Pain welled up in Janice’s stomach, almost like she herself had been the one stabbed. Great, now she wanted to cry, and now was the worst time to show weakness to her opponent.

 

“Calm down.” The Batter demanded. Walking away from the door, he leaned against the wall and put his bat down, and folded his arms.

 

“I am not a specter. If I wanted to kill you I would have already.”

 

“How are you still standing! I just stabbed you!” Janice wanted to scream, but she didn’t want to draw attention to that fact. Even though she was defending herself, she could have very easily been arrested as the attacker, she was the one with blood on her hands.

 

“I have been stabbed, but I am fine.” The Batter responded, completely indifferent the emotional strife he was causing Janice. Lifting up his arm, it was suddenly awash with a pure white light, and the bleeding wound on his stomach simply vanished. Not even a trace of blood remained, the only sign that it had ever happened being the hole in the purifier’s tunic.

 

Janice stood there in awe. “I’ve gone insane. There’s nothing else it could be. Aw fuck.”

 

“That’s nice. Now are you going to guide me or not?” The Batter replied, like an absolute bastard. Janice was still in too much shock to call him on it.

 

“S-stay right there. I’m gonna, get my phone. And see if I’m crazy or not.” Janice scampered up to her room and grabbed her phone before returning. Just as Janice had asked him, he remained where he stood there, waiting.

 

Janice held up her smart phone, and The Batter watched her movements, staring at the phone with mild curiosity. The phone made a shutter noise, and the purifier’s eyes contracted from the sudden burst of light. 

 

“Uhh, sorry I left the flash on.” Janice mumbled, busy sending the picture to the one friend she could guarantee was on at this hour, SK8’R’DIE.

 

The file sent with no problems, and Janice stared at the picture as it displayed in the message log. She remembered reading somewhere that a way for people who have hallucinations to tell if the person they’re seeing is real or not, because the hallucination wouldn’t show up in a picture. But there he was, clear as day, staring at her with red, demonic, cat like eyes. 

 

After a couple minutes, Skate responded.

 

‘Janice that is the coolest cosplayer i’ve ever seen can you please tell me who he is’

‘tike holy shit those eyes those abs and the skin is just perfect like how he’s so cool’

 

Janice didn’t read the rest of skate’s messages, because she lowered the phone and instead stared at The Batter. She was still in shock, but her fear had mostly vanished by this point, so she could ask some questions.

 

“So I’m not hallucinating?”

 

“No, you’re not.”

 

“Y-You’re actually The Batter?”

 

“Yes. I am The Batter.”

 

Janice slowly pressed her hand to her forehead, and walked into the kitchen to sit down. He followed her there, and she glanced back at him. He said he didn’t mean her any harm, but she still had a bad feeling about him. However, animosity was now having to contend with guilt.

 

“Sorry about stabbing you I guess. You really shouldn’t sneak up on people while holding a bat, or watch them sleep. Makes them flip out, ya know?”

 

Going to the fridge, she opened it up and grabbed a carton of milk, and proceeded to make breakfast. While she did so, The Batter just stood there and stared at her, and Janice looked back. 

 

“What are you waiting for? Do you want something to eat?”

 

The Batter glanced at the fridge, then back to Janice. “I’m waiting for commands. But I will eat something if it suits me.”

 

Janice went into the crisper, remembering that basically everyone in OFF ate meat, so she grabbed some deli ham and took it out.

 

“You want this hot? I can cook it on a pan or something. Though it’s already pre cooked, not raw like you usually have it.” Janice replied while holding up the sealed bag of meat.

 

The Batter walked over and grabbed it from her and tore open the bag, not even noticing that it was supposed to be resealable. Holding up the meat to his nose, he sniffed it, then took a huge bite. Walking back over to the wall, he proceeded to chew it up, and ate the whole thing.

 

Janice watched him eat, sighed, then got to work making her bowl of cereal. She, unlike some people, was going to eat at the table, and munched on her bowl of corn flakes while eyeing the purifier. Between bites, she spoke.

  
  


“So, I’m assuming you want me to be your puppeteer, right? That’s what I’m assuming you mean by ‘guidance.’”

 

“You are correct.” The Batter replied, his mouth still full of meat while he spoke. 

 

Janice frowned some since it was gross, but she looked back to her cereal. Mustering up her courage, she replied.

 

“Why do you need one? Your mission is over, everyone in your world is dead, just about. You won. What, do you want to kill my world too?” 

 

Janice couldn’t hide the venom in her voice, and she glared at The Batter, gripping her spoon in the same manner as the dagger she had earlier. Another reason why she sat at the table was that it was near the kitchen counter, on top of which being a block full of kitchen knives.

 

The Batter didn’t have any visible emotional response to her words, and replied to them as if he were merely speaking about the weather.

 

“You are correct in that my mission is over. But I still exist, so I need a purpose. For that end, I have come to your world. I may ‘kill it’ as you said, but only if the situation requires such a thing. My home was a sick, rotting corpse, and all I did was bury it.”

 

Janice looked away from him, and back to her cereal. She couldn’t argue with what he said, even if she couldn’t condone genocide. She also couldn’t condone the suffering that everyone there was undergoing.

 

“So, what now? You’re asking me for a reason for why you should exist? How the fuck should I know? I’m not some great judge of the merit on life itself.” She replied bluntly.

 

“That’s not what I said. I am asking for a mission. This place could surely make use of my services.”

 

Janice clenched one fist, and the other she put her hand over her mouth. She so very badly wanted to scream at him, to tell him how the world had already suffered from too many delusional, self righteous men who thought it was their god given right to kill whoever they wanted. 

 

But if she fought him here and now, she didn’t see any chance of her winning. No, it was better to agree to do what he said, gain his trust, and give her time to find some way to kill him before he could hurt anyone else.

  
  
  


“I know what you’re thinking.” The Batter stated. He stared at her, cold and detached, like he was looking at a malfunctioning can opener. Janice wanted to gouge every last one of those red eyes out.

 

“You have a very strong sense of justice, which is one of the reasons why I picked you. Once you understand me and my intentions, I’m sure you’ll come to the conclusion that we’re meant to work together.”

 

Janice stood up and gave him a sardonic smile, and picked up her finished cereal bowl to put in the sink.

 

“Well then, Mr. Batter. Let’s maybe try to come up with a mission for you that doesn’t involve mass murder, huh?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [finally he fuckin shows up, man. Two and a half chapters of build up is normally not my shtick, but oh well. ]


	4. Day 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Janice is rude but entirely justified.

The Batter didn’t respond verbally to what she said, instead he just narrowed his four eyes. She hated them, but it was the only part of The Batter's face she could stand looking at for any extended period of time. So arrogant, so haughty. Nothing like Him. Janice wondered how much bleach this bastard had to use on his clothes just to get all the blood out. She turned away and picked her phone off of the counter to start scrolling through the news. 

 

“So, do you know anything about how this world works, or are you completely clueless?" 

 

Still, Janice got no response.

 

“What’s wrong, did I scare you, rat bastard?” 

 

Janice didn’t add the last part, but she certainly wanted to, even if it would be an insult to ratkind. She should have known better than to try and bait someone so dangerous, but it was hard when all Janice wanted to do was rip The Batter’s face off at the nearest opportunity.

 

‘I am aware of human behavior.’ The Batter finally said, after much deliberation. It struck Janice as odd that he’d actually be careful with anything, maybe it was because Janice was doing a bad job at hiding the pissed off look on her face.

 

“Okay…” Janice sighed and walked over to the toaster. She grabbed a loaf of bread from the counter and threw the slice in without adding anything to it. Not expecting a better answer than what the purifier just said, she instead stared at the purifier’s face to try and guess what he was thinking. As per usual, The Batter’s face was stony and impassive. But his four red eyes were staring at the shiny metal toaster with some interest.

 

Turning around to glance at it, Janice saw nothing unusual with the cooking appliance. The young woman shrugged and leaned against the counter with her arms crossed while she awaited the toasting. The Batter was still looking at the toaster for a time, and he opened his mouth to say something when the toaster dinged and crispy bread came jumping out. 

 

Jumping forwards in the same motion he grabbed his bat, he ran forwards and pointed his weapon at the machine, stopping just short of bashing it to bits. For her part, Janice stood there in shock before bursting out laughing. It was hoarse and wheezing at first before evolving into full on guffawing.    
  


“You really don’t know shit about this place, do you? Did you even realize that you were being a total creep earlier?”

 

The Batter said nothing, but glared at the toaster with scorn from all of his blood red eyes.

 

Gradually, Janice stopped laughing as something suddenly dawned on her. “Wow, when was the last time you even acted like a regular person? Probably never, right? That sounds more accurate.” She scoffed and walked away from The Batter, going back near the knife block.

  
“You know, being silent and mysterious isn’t really helping me trust you.” Janice baited, despite her earlier decision. It’d be nice to see the purifier being honest for once, but Janice wasn’t going to hedge her bets.

 

“Okay, say nothing. I’m just going to guess what you’re thinking, and make the worst possible assumptions…”

 

‘Fine.’ The Batter grumbled. Janice tilted her head and had to restrain her smirk when she  heard him emote something. For once his face also expressed what he was feeling, and from Janice’s point of view he reminded her of an animal that was about to bite someone, what with the lip curl and razor sharp teeth.

 

Was it just her, or did they look more human earlier?

 

Wisely, she decided to edge off for now, and eventually The Batter spoke.

 

‘Yes, I need you in this world. I thought that was clear. And I want to know the purpose of that accursed  _ cube _ .’ He spat out the word, then went back to his usual cool mannerisms.

 

“You mean the toaster?” Janice said, walking over to pull out her piece of toast and taking a bite out of it. 

 

“Mmm, crunchy...You want some?” The girl asked. The Batter shook his head no. “Suit yourself,” Janice answered, and went to the fridge to put some jam on her toast.

 

“So,” She said, trying to get more out of the purifier. “You don’t like strange noises?”

 

‘Why would I.’ The Batter answered flatly.

 

“Mmm.” Janice said sagely. “You picked a bad place to seek your fortunes. This place is full of weird ass noises, and I’ve been known to make some myself.”

 

The Batter tightened the grip on his bat and Janice shook her head. “You know I was joking with you, right? I wouldn’t trust you to take out the trash, much less try and risk getting clubbed to death.”

 

The purifier leaned on the kitchen counter and put down his bat, folding his arms as his eyes were obscured in shadow from his ball-cap.

 

Another silence passed between them, broken up by the sound of Janice munching on her toast and the soft thrum of the air conditioner pouring coolness through the vent near the ceiling. She stared long and hard at the clock on the wall. It currently read 2 pm.

 

Janice hadn’t had the chance to check what time she woke up, not with the ominous presence that was lurking in her room. At least he wasn’t quite as scary as before, granted that he got scared by a toaster. No, scared wasn’t the right word. A better way for Janice to describe it was pissed off. 

 

The Batter had been so bizarre about the whole affair that Janice forgot what she had decided to do for that morning, but with a little thought she remembered. She had planned on spending the day doing her homework, catching up on the notes Dr. Neverwinter left for her just the other night. Now wasn’t the time though, Janice doubted The Batter would leave her alone long enough to get any studying done.

 

Instead, Janice took this time to mentally prepare a speech. It would be the most succinct way she could even begin to explain the clusterfuck that is her world, while doing it in such a way she could maybe try to get the purifier to slow down before charging ahead like an idiot. The man in question cleared his throat at her prolonged silence, so she sighed and went ahead.

 

“So,” She started, interrupting the quiet around them. “If you’re going to be of any use to this place, you’re going to have to know how humans work, how we think, and what our issues are. Here’s a hint, we have a lot of them. From war, famine, to even genocide.”

 

Janice turned and glared at The Batter before continuing.

 

“Our planet is polluted by mass industry and modern life, while species go extinct by the day. Innocent people are locked behind bars while the greatest monsters of our time run free. While the richest of our kind live in excess and luxury, those without starve on the streets. A few of these elites have enough wealth to end world hunger several times over, yet they do not. Even worse, they’re still considered right for their decision by a good number of people.”

 

‘Just kill them.’ The Batter interjected.

 

“Me, personally? Even if you could help, two people don’t have the strength to overturn entire governments. I don’t care if you can handle a stab wound, I doubt you could survive having your head blown to chunks from a thousand yards away. Humans are experts in projectile weaponry.”

 

The purifier grunted in disbelief, so Janice pulled up a video on her phone of a .50 caliber rifle being used on steel plate and making a hole in it. She handed the device to The Batter to look at while she went on.

 

“Today, the most common threat is that of corporate greed and governments run amok with power, all enabled by apathy and ignorance from the general public. Our entertainment and news media profit off of spreading misinformation about key subjects ranging to the sins of politicians to something as mundane as taking a vaccination. But if you listen to multiple sources, you can see where the truths and lies intersect. Daunting, isn’t it?” Janice asked.

 

The Batter was undeterred. “When I have a mission, I complete it. The details don’t matter.” He answered coldly. Putting her phone on the counter, the purifier turned to stare down at Janice. His ruby red eyes glowed even in the light of the sun, his pupils contracted to be befitting of a nocturnal predator. 

 

_ “You know of this world. What is my mission?”  _ The man demanded. Janice leaned back and squinted her eyes, walking away to wash her dishes in the sink.

 

“I just said I don’t trust you to take out the trash, now you expect me to just hand you the fate of the whole goddamn world? Even with step by step instructions you’d twist it into something terrible. No, you’re clueless and unprepared.” 

 

Janice felt daring and considered taking a step towards The Batter, but she thought better of it and kept her distance. The last thing she wanted was for the baseball bastard to whack her with his bat on impulse, she’d probably have done the same if the situation was switched.

 

“I bet you didn’t even understand half of the terms I just listed in my explanation. You can’t help if you don’t even know what you’re trying to fix, or why you should fix it. You’ll need to work on yourself and build up to the more difficult shit.”

 

The Batter clenched his fists, but took no violent actions. ‘Those are all your reservations?’

 

Janice scoffed. “Some of many. Now I’m going to make some coffee, want any?”

 

The purifier nodded and leaned back on the counter. He crossed his arms and tapped his leg, from what Janice assumed was impatience.

 

“Hey, don’t worry. The keurig works fast.” Janice grabbed a mug and a coffee pod and walked over to the machine. 

 

The Batter walked over to observe over her shoulder while she loaded up the device, then opened the top to fill it with water. All Janice had to do was then press a button and step back, and within two minutes a cup of fresh black coffee was made. 

 

Janice picked it up and offered it to him.

 

“Jeez, just from that little noise you’re tense? Yeah it’s a little bit like a horrible screeching, but it’s quiet enough. And taste that coffee, it’s delicious.”

 

The Batter brought it up to his lips, then immediately wrinkled his nose in disgust. Janice shook her head.

 

“You’re supposed to put milk or something into it first. It’s not like we have magic sweet coffee beans or some kind of special bullshit here. Well, not unless it’s cold brew. But that’s not cold brew you’re drinking.”

 

Going to her fridge, the young woman grabbed some amenities for her guest, these consisting of milk, sugar, and vanilla creamer. 

 

The Batter curled his lip in disgust when he caught sight of the sugar, and Janice put up her hand.

 

“What? Don’t look at me like that. Nobody here is that messed up that they’d eat sugar made out of elsen, besides, we don’t have any elsen period. That stuff right there is made from a plant, so you can eat it guilt free. If you even feel guilt.”

 

The young woman tilted her head. “To be honest, I’m surprised you’d care in the first place.”

 

‘The process is impure. The product tainted.’ The Batter answered gruffly. He took the milk and poured it into his coffee, avoiding the other products carefully. 

 

Once made to his liking, The Batter brought it to his lips and took a sip. He then quirked an eyebrow, and kept drinking.

 

_ At least he likes something.  _ Janice remarked to herself.

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry everybody, I had a good update schedule rolling but depression hit me like a freight train. I'll try getting back into it. Tbh I'll probably go back and edit this chapter but it looks alright for now.


End file.
